Here I am, you scumbags.

Friday, September 07, 2007

I'm feeling shut-the-fuck up!

I wanted to keep this myspace blog, just cuz I took the time to write it. But I didn't want it up anymore. It was a downer.

"Am I "feeling fat"? I'm feeling shut-the-fuck up!

Wow. All day I've seen these new Flash cartoon ads, when I'm signing into Yahoo, that are advertising patches you apply to your skin that are supposed to curb your appetite. "Sit back and let CurbYourCravings do the work for you!" & "Feeling fat? Lose 25lbs by August 31st!" Let's remember, August 31st is only 23 days from now! That would be hideously unhealthy to lose all that weight that quickly.
Anyway, that's all terribly fucked up. I don't know how these people sleep at night when they know that they're taking advantage of the deep sadness and self-loathing of people. And before I go on, let's remember who's talking here. I've had my times of bulk. I was never skinny-skinny, but I blew up once due to hanging out with a stoner, and dating a guy who didn't love me. The heaviest that I ever weighed, in my own recorded history (god knows how much I weighed in periods where I never reached a scale), was 169 lbs in 2003 (I'm 5'3"). I went to Weight Watchers, learned it well & attended all the classes of that "semester". Now, in 2007, I'm down to a steady 130. That's roughly a loss of 40 lbs, after learning how to eat. (By the way, that doesn't mean I always eat right nowadays, so don't scold me in a diner). So it breaks my heart to see the terrible shit that people buy into, due to desperation.
A girl I love very much, who would be classified as a "real woman", once flippantly said to me something about how she was saving up to buy diet pills that would "really work this time". I moved the exclamation point from above my head and said, "What? No you aren't? Oh honey, don't do that! It's a scam!" (or something along those lines). She replied with the claims that the advertisements made - she could eat anything she wanted, and the pills would take care of the fat. This was supposed to shut me up. So I just shut up. I didn't want to press the subject further, she looked like a kid anticipating Christmas. One big, awful, disappointing Christmas.
Back to this ad, that begins with, "Feeling fat?". I know this may be stupid and nit-picky, but I don't even like how they phrased that. Feeling fat? Why can't you just say, "Fat?" Feeling fat is more fucked up. Nicole Richie is feeling fat. I'm feeling fat right now, because I'm all PMS'd up. Haha. I suppose, however, that even if you asked, "Fat?" the girls with poor body images or full-blown eating disorders would answer, "Yeah."
Right now I can't think of a way to end this blog, because thoughts like this have plagued me for years. That's what happens when you're obsessed with the psychology behind advertising and your mom has weighed considerably less than you 3/4ths of your life.

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Indy chick

I doing some freelance graphic design for a t-shirt company that does Indy 500 shirts, etc. That means corny catchphrases, but, eh, oh well.
Original older version:

Final, younger version, (before I deleted fake logos):

Final thingy:

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

Hot for walking Spellchecks

Hey hey!
Mikeofottawa mentioned I haven't had a post in over a month. That is true. I got a job. Not an art job or anything, (pout), just a cubicle job for money. That way I can save up to move elsewhere for a real job.
Anyway, I have work soon, so I'll just post a drawing and shut up.
**I didn't build exactly the way I should, so if she's not Preston Blair round, don't complain--I wasn't tryin'!**
It depicts how turned on I get when I have a friend that can spell. Grammar is a plus, but spelling in and of itself is hot.

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

I'm gettin Rusty

My friend Rusty (aka Stephanie) is kind of hard to draw because there's not much to exaggerate. She's pretty:

This pic would be a good example, but she went crazy with Photoshop one day:

But I've been wanting to learn how to draw her. So I studied her face and I tried to draw it in different ways, over and over, until I got it.

She and I both want to move to California. I think she wants to do it for the adventure, but I just need to be there for job purposes. And I might go crazy if I stay here much longer. So I wanted to do a drawing of she and I living together....
Here's a sketch of me:

I liked the big eyes on my original sketch of myself, but I shrunk the eyes down a few times because my eyes squint when I smile. My cheeks take over my face. However, now that I see how my face turned out, I kind of wish I had left it with the big eyes. Eh, I dunno.

Friday, March 31, 2006

My cartoon

***Sorry guys, the night I wrote this post Blogger was having some problems. It looked to me that I hadn't even published the post--and now I see--here it is. Cuz I knew I couldn't get that damn YouTube to work inside of my post, and I was then gonna trash the post. But anyway, here are links.***

So, I finally realized how easy it is to put my animation on the web. I made this three years ago in my last year of college. It is FULL of mistakes and shitty, embarrassing short-cuts, and some bad drawings, but eh, I was a rookie and I had a deadline to meet. Be easy on it.
Here it is, known to my college friends as "Tapeworm", but titled
"The Cellulite Parasite"

And here are the rest of the little videos I have up there. My reel and Bridget ideos.

Friday, March 24, 2006

My Lil' Bridgey

Check out these pics of my cute little doggy carrying around a baby My Little Pony:

Oh, and I was officially dumped last night. That means more time to draw, so I'll have more stuff up soon.

Thursday, March 23, 2006


So things have been kind of shitty lately. I've just been trying to concentrate on drawing, but the boyfriend keeps almost breaking up with me. Ignoring that, last night I drew this, blowing up this weird girl's head from my magazine. She looks like an elf.

Weird stuff. But then I thought, "What the hell am I doing? I should be working on cartoony stuff." I guess I'm just having trouble concentrating on anything. This isn't amazing, but it was an attempt at taking a Preston character and placing him in a position I made up. So, yay team.

I've been trying to distract myself from my decaying relationship, and one piece of news I learned yesterday perked me up a little bit. I am 130 lbs right now. That is crazy! To some girls that may not be impressive, but in 2002 I reached 170 lbs. I haven't been 130 since high school. In 2003 I went to Weight Watchers, so now I know how to get things under control. The funny thing is, I haven't been concentrating on it recently. So, I don't understand how this happened. Here's the visual difference:

and 130...

40 lbs and blindingly-red lipstick later :)